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I didn't realize just how strong and compelling a fantasy can be.
Some time ago, I met a guy. I didn't expect anything when I first met him, but we had fun talking. He was easy to talk to and knowledgeable about a lot of things, and I looked forward to seeing him. We even found stuff in common. We built a rapport of sorts and that's when I made a wrong step.
I started fantasizing about him, making up stories about him in my head. I knew they were make-believe, of course, but they filled me with hope, which is more addicting than I realized.
To be fair, he didn't mislead me about anything. He was maybe just being himself--friendly, funny and smart--and maybe I read more into it than there was.
Just a few days ago, I found out he has a girlfriend. (I know, I'm stupid. I should've tried to find that out from the start, but I couldn't without prying.) I was...not shattered, but something close to it. My hopes lay in broken pieces around my feet and I was surprised when I even shed a few tears. (Too emotional for my own good)
The end of a dream would do that to a person, I think. I only thank God that I come to know of it this soon rather than later, when I probably would have fallen deeper into my self-created fantasy. I know it's not the end of the world, but I also know it would take some time for me to get over this. It's not everyday I find a man I like--really like--only to discover he's already taken.
Why couldn't my life be a book with an HEA after 300 or so pages?
P.S. I had the strongest urge to rename this blog "Broken Dreams", then realized it's not just my blog.
Some time ago, I met a guy. I didn't expect anything when I first met him, but we had fun talking. He was easy to talk to and knowledgeable about a lot of things, and I looked forward to seeing him. We even found stuff in common. We built a rapport of sorts and that's when I made a wrong step.
I started fantasizing about him, making up stories about him in my head. I knew they were make-believe, of course, but they filled me with hope, which is more addicting than I realized.
To be fair, he didn't mislead me about anything. He was maybe just being himself--friendly, funny and smart--and maybe I read more into it than there was.
Just a few days ago, I found out he has a girlfriend. (I know, I'm stupid. I should've tried to find that out from the start, but I couldn't without prying.) I was...not shattered, but something close to it. My hopes lay in broken pieces around my feet and I was surprised when I even shed a few tears. (Too emotional for my own good)
The end of a dream would do that to a person, I think. I only thank God that I come to know of it this soon rather than later, when I probably would have fallen deeper into my self-created fantasy. I know it's not the end of the world, but I also know it would take some time for me to get over this. It's not everyday I find a man I like--really like--only to discover he's already taken.
Why couldn't my life be a book with an HEA after 300 or so pages?
P.S. I had the strongest urge to rename this blog "Broken Dreams", then realized it's not just my blog.
4 comments:
Silver.
((( hugs )))
Chin up, girl. His loss.
You'll find him one day. In the meantime, we're here for you.
O honey, that's sad, I'm so sorry!
*hugs*
Carole, Shana and Janna, your friendships mean a lot! :) Really appreciate your presence in my life.
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